“Knowing is half the battle…” I remember that from the end of those old G.I Joe cartoons. Well, I know what I should be doing, so I’m halfway to somewhere, and I’m not afraid of failing because you learn from that, but the fear of not getting it right keeps me from starting or finishing things.

Even writing this blog was stressful – I wanted to read everyone else’s blog first before I even started, but I managed to reign myself in and just glanced at some titles and then closed the page and started writing here on this empty page.

I need to learn this discipline of sitting, writing, reading, etc., and figure out a new purpose. I can’t keep rolling out of bed and just seeing what happens at work each day and then come home and start all over.

I had a DMP 27 years ago but didn’t know that’s what it was – I wanted the house, car, and job with a pension and surrounded myself with great teachers and people who helped me grow along the way, but now I’ve had it for some years and I don’t know what to do now… especially since my mom passed in 2020. I was her caretaker most of my life so it’s like I’ve been treading water and occasionally letting the current take me places.

And now it’s taken me here. I’m going to stop fighting the current and let go of what I’m holding on to.

I’m super grateful for finding this space. I heard about it a couple of years ago but didn’t think I’d be worthy or something, so now, I think I’m in the right place at the right time.