This week has been a tough one for me in terms of the MKE. I had one day where I was moving around outside the home all day. I am not used to this. I am used to being in charge of my schedule at home.

Anyway I slipped out of doing all my readings. The NEXT day I was at home but I was incredibly physically tired. I used that as an excuse to not do my readings and speaking yet again. This causes me right now to feel detached from the whole process so I look forward to watching Week Four.

One interesting aspect was creating a new DMP. My first two DMP’s were pretty simple and bad in terms of the language. My advisor told me basically what was wrong or missing with them but until I watched Week three video where they went over a number of DMPs I didn’t know how to do a proper one (from the MKE standpoint).

I spent a LOT of time on my new one. I had the idea that the reason I didn’t get into writing a good DMP right away was everything I had seen was so materialistic and superficial. So I worked very hard to find an expression of my needs which was ‘spiritual’ enough. I had changed one of my needs for the second DMP but for the third I changed TWO of my needs.

Each time I read it I am inspired on a very high level. In retrospect it reads like a prayer which wasn’t what I tried to do. Another thought I have had is that I am doing all this for ME! If anyone knows how to reach my inner subby it should be me.

BUT it was after submitting my new DMP that I had my two bad days. What gives? Someone might say my subby is resisting something but I don’t know if there is a simple direct connection like that or not.

Another possibility is I haven’t found my true needs and goals. I also notice that even though my first DMP was not great, when I look at what I have accomplished in the last two weeks, it is mostly contained within my first DMP?