This week has been an emotionally charged week. It’s been a real struggle some days to keep the depression and anxiety demons from controlling my Subby. However, I have tools to help me deal with the depression and anxiety demons. I use my affirmation “I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, happy, and healthy” and I look for silver linings throughout my day.

I feel gratitude when someone does something nice for me. On Tuesday my boss gave me some Greek salad, my coworker fed me some strawberries dipped in cream and chocolate, and hubby made a ginger beef dish for our supper. Each dish made me so happy and grateful. I couldn’t help but smile while I ate good food.

I was able to laugh when a bank teller called to let me know I left my bank card in the ATM…again. I told the bank teller, “That’s the second time I’ve done that in a month!” We both laughed at my forgetfulness. In the past I would have put myself down and been loathsome with myself. Not anymore.

I’ve enjoyed several walks in the sunshine, not any easy feat since most days it’s been raining and the sunshine is so fleeting. I’ve been enjoying the spring flowers (crocuses, camellias, ornamental cherries, daffodils) that have burst into bloom. It’s hard to feel depressed when I’m surrounded by so much beauty.

Last Monday was recycling day. I was up early and collected refundables for nearly 3 hours. I didn’t get upset when one of my competitors beat me to some of the refundables. Instead, I thanked Father God for the items I did collect, including the items the lady missed because she was in such a hurry she didn’t notice the items that were hiding in the recycling bins. I had a great time talking to people I met. Some people even encouraged me to take their refundables and even put some in my bag.

This week we’ve been learning about Wallace D. Wattles and studying Og Mandino’s Scroll VI.

In Scroll VI I gravitated towards Og Mandino’s encouraging poem:

If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labor.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will remember past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be master of my emotions.
(The Greatest Salesman in the World, p. 80).

This was exactly what I needed to read this week! I liked it so much I put it on my wall on my shape sheet and next to my paper genie lamp. On my genie lamp I wrote “What am I pretending not to know?” On the “smoke” emerging from the lamp I wrote “What would the woman I intend to become do next?” I like having visual reminders around me.

In the Week 22a webinar both Lori and Day shared numerous quotes from Wattles. Two of these quotes resonated with me the most. I put this quote on my wall:

I surrender my body to be ruled by my mind;
I yield my mind to the dominion of my soul,
and I give my soul to the guidance of God.
(Wallace D. Wattles, The Science of Being Great).

The more gratefully we fix our minds on the Supreme when good things come to us the more good things we will receive, and the more rapidly they will come; and the reason simply is that the mental attitude of gratitude draws the mind into closer touch with the source from which the blessings come.
(Wallace D. Wattles, The Science of Getting Rich).

I don’t know what the future holds but I know that living a life of gratitude and talking to Father God on a daily basis is helping to minimize the depression and anxiety demons’ attacks on my Subby and I’m feeling happier, too.

Finally, brothers and sisters, fill your minds with beauty and truth. Meditate on whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good, whatever is virtuous and praiseworthy…and the God of peace will walk with you.
(Philippians 4:8, 9b, The Voice Bible).